Most people fall short of their potential not due to lack of ability, but improper mindset.
How are we socially?
Think about how you feel going out with your friends to a bar. Are you comfortable there (and I don’t mean comfortable about drinking)? Does the crowd bother you:? How likely are you to buy a pretty girl a drink?
Looking at situations gives you a bit of insight into how you look at the world. Don’t worry, there’s no right or wrong, just ways of dealing with real situations. Depending on your mindset, you’ll either make things into positive experiences or negative ones.
If you’re like me, you’re fine in a bar. As long as it isn’t crowded. I hate crowds, so I avoid them whenever possible. As for the girl (this is the pre-married me, of course), if she was by herself or with just one friend, I’d buy her a drink no problem. Put a group of her friends together, and I’d do everything in my power not to make eye contact.
Why don’t I like crowds? I grew up mostly alone, remember. There wasn’t a lot of social activity or traffic in my youth, so I’m cool around a small group. The bigger the group, the more noise. The more noise, the more chaos. The more chaos, and I’m outta there.
How about the girl? Well, fear of rejection is powerful. Obviously, I’ve been turned down plenty, and somewhere along the way, I lost my mojo. The larger the group of girlfriends, the more I’d cower in the corner.
As an older and more confident version of myself, I now don’t have these hang-ups with crowds or rejection. In fact, I now view failure and rejection as tools for self-improvement. In order for that to happen, I had to change my mindset from one of solitude and fear, to one of hunger and growth. I assure you, these activities are not unique to me!
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